The Law of Chastity:
Honor, Worthiness, Power, Glory

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Elder Richard G. Scott
Purposes of Intimacy in Marriage
“Making the Right Choices,” Conference Report, October 1994

Within the enduring covenant of marriage, the Lord permits husband and wife the expression of the sacred procreative powers in all their loveliness and beauty within the bounds He has set.  One purpose of this private, sacred, intimate experience is to provide the physical bodies for the spirits Father in Heaven wants to experience mortality.  Another reason for these powerful and beautiful feelings of love is to bind husband and wife together in loyalty, fidelity, consideration of each other, and common purpose.

Any sexual intimacy outside of the bonds of marriage—I mean any intentional contact with the sacred, private parts of another’s body, with or without clothing—is a sin and is forbidden by God. It is also a transgression to intentionally stimulate these emotions within your own body. ... [Remember] that true love elevates, protects, respects, and enriches another.

What is love? Many people think of it as mere physical attraction and they casually speak of "falling in love" and "love at first sight." This may be Hollywood's version and the interpretation of those who write love songs and love fiction. True love is not wrapped in such flimsy material. One might become immediately attracted to another individual, but love is far more than physical attraction. It is deep, inclusive and comprehensive. Physical attraction is only one of the many elements, but there must be faith and confidence and understanding and partnership. There must be common ideals and standards. There must be a great devotion and companionship. Love is cleanliness and progress and sacrifice and selflessness. This kind of love never tires nor wanes, but lives through sickness and sorrow, poverty and privation, accomplishment and disappointment, time and eternity. For the love to continue, there must be an increase constantly of confidence and understanding, of frequent and sincere expression of appreciation and affection. There must be a forgetting of self and a constant concern for the other. Interests, hopes, objectives must be constantly focused into a single channel.

For many years, I saw a strong man carry his tiny, emaciated, arthritic wife to meetings and wherever she could go. There could be no sexual expression. Here was selfless indication of affection. I think that is pure love. I saw a kindly woman wait on her husband for many years as he deteriorated with muscular dystrophy. She waited on him hand and foot, night and day, when all he could do was to blink his eyes in thanks. I believe that was love.

I knew a woman who carried her little unfortunate child until the body was too heavy to carry, and then she pushed her in a wheel chair for the following years until her death. The deprived child could never express an appreciation. It seems to me that that was love. Another mother visited regularly her son who was in the penitentiary. She could receive nothing from him. She gave much, all she had.

If anyone feels that petting or other deviations are demonstrations of love, let him ask himself: "If this beautiful body which I have misused suddenly became deformed, or paralyzed, would my reactions be the same ? If this lovely face were scarred by flames, or this body which I have used suddenly became rigid, or this keen mind which I have enjoyed were suddenly to become blank, would I be such an ardent lover? If senility or any of its approaches suddenly fell upon my sweetheart, what would my attitudes be?" Answers to these questions might test one to see if he really is in love or if it is only physical attraction which encouraged the improper physical contacts. The young man who protects his sweetheart against all use or abuse, against insult and infamy from himself or others, could be expressing true love.

But the young man who uses his companion as a biological toy to give himself temporary satisfaction-that is lust, and is at the other end of the spectrum from love. A young woman conducts herself to be attractive spiritually, mentally and physically but will not by word nor dress nor act stir nor stimulate to physical reactions the companion beside her. That could be true love. That young woman who must touch and stir and fondle and tempt and use knows not love. That is lust and exploitation.

Elder M. Russell Ballard
The Standard of Purity is not Another Lifestyle Choice
Our Search for Happiness, p. 106

The Lord's standard of sexual purity isn't just another lifestyle choice in a world rife with worry and paranoia. Those who choose to live it are spared the emotional consequences of meaningless one-night stands, the spiritual trauma of unrequited commitment, and the inherent moral dilemma of a relationship in which gratification is a higher priority than responsibility. Instead, they open themselves to the remarkable possibilities of a marriage built on a sure foundation of mutual trust, commitment, and respect.

The First Presidency: Pres. Heber J. Grant, J. Reuben Clark, David O. McKay
A Warning Against Unchastity
Conference Report, October 1942, pp.11-12

By virtue of the authority in us vested as the First Presidency of the Church, we warn our people ... of the degradation, the wickedness, the punishment that attend upon unchastity; we urge you to remember the blessings which flow from the living of the clean life; we call upon you to keep, day in and day out, the way of strictest chastity, through which only can God's choice gifts come to you and His Spirit abide with you.

How glorious is he who lives the chaste life. He walks unfearful in the full glare of the noonday sun, for he is without moral infirmity. He can be reached by no shafts of base calumny, for his armor is without flaw. His virtue cannot be challenged by any just accuser, for he lives above reproach. His cheek is never blotched with shame, for he is without hidden sin. He is honored and respected by all mankind, for he is beyond their censure. He is loved by the Lord, for he stands without blemish. The exaltations of eternities await his coming.

Elder Bruce C. Hafen
Purity While Dating
"The Gospel and Romantic Love," Ensign, Oct. 1982, pp.64-67

... [Have] reverence for life, and the life-giving powers of the human body ... during the time of courtship, always be emotionally honest in the expression of affection. Sometimes you are not as careful as you might be about when, how, and to whom you express your feelings of affection. You must realize that the desire to express affection can be motivated by things other than true love.

... In your courtships, even when you feel there is a growing foundation of true love, show your profound respect for that love and the possibilities of your life together by restraining your passions. Do not be deceived by the false notion that anything short of the sex act itself is acceptable conduct. That is a lie, not only because one step overpoweringly leads to another, but also because the handling of another’s body is in an important sense part of the sexual act that is kept holy by the sanctuary of chastity. If ever you are in doubt about where the line is between love and lust, draw the line toward the side of love. Nobody ever fell off a cliff who never went near one.

... Sometimes you may let someone take improper liberties with you, or you may indulge yourself in some practice that seems to bring temporary relief but only makes you feel worse in the long run. Some even make poor marriage choices, just to show the world that somebody will have them. Ultimately, however, only the Lord’s approval of your life really matters.

Elder Joseph Fielding Smith
A Sin Against Marriage
The Progress of Man, p. 391

One of the most wicked and devilish doctrines ever advocated is the doctrine of "trial marriage."  The downfall of nations in the past, in large measure, has been due to the cheapness with which the marital bonds were held, and to the violation of the sanctity of the home.  Loose morals and disrespect for women is the natural outgrowth of the vulgar and iniquitous understanding which so many today have for these sacred covenants and obligations. ... The cheapness and vulgarity with which the world looks upon and receives marriage is one of the potent factors of disintegration of the home and of the nations.  The world today is practicing unchastity, and the Lord has said that the committing of this sin is second only to murder.

The greatest glory that can be given to man is found in the eternal covenant of marriage-- the power to become gods, even the sons of God and to possess the power to create and hold the everlasting right of increase.

The Prophet Joseph Smith
The Power to Resist Temptations Resides in the Mortal Body
Teachings, p.181 - January 5, 1841

All beings who have bodies have power over those who have not. The devil has no power over us only as we permit him. The moment we revolt at anything which comes from God, the devil takes power. ...

We came to this earth that we might have a body and present it pure before God in the celestial kingdom. The great principle of happiness consists in having a body. The devil has no body, and herein is his punishment. He is pleased when he can obtain the tabernacle of man, and when cast out by the Savior he asked to go into the herd of swine, showing that he would prefer a swine's body to having none.

Now, in a spirit of sympathy and love, I speak to you who may be struggling against temptations for which there is no moral expression. Some have resisted temptation but never seem to be free from it.  Do not yield!  Cultivate the spiritual strength to resist—all of your life, if need be.

Some are tortured by thoughts of covenants already forsaken and sometimes think of suicide. Suicide is no solution at all. Do not even think of it. The very fact that you are so disturbed marks you as a spiritually sensitive soul for whom there is great hope.

You may wonder why God does not seem to hear your pleading prayers and erase these temptations. When you know the gospel plan, you will understand that the conditions of our mortal probation require that we be left to choose. That test is the purpose of life. While these addictions may have devoured, for a time, your sense of morality or quenched the spirit within you, it is never too late.

You may not be able, simply by choice, to free yourself at once from unworthy feelings. You can choose to give up the immoral expression of them.

The suffering you endure from resisting or from leaving a life-style of addiction or perversion is not a hundredth part of that suffered by your parents, your spouse or your children, if you give up. Theirs is an innocent suffering because they love you. To keep resisting or to withdraw from such a life-style is an act of genuine unselfishness, a sacrifice you place on the altar of obedience. It will bring enormous spiritual rewards.

Remember that agency, that freedom of choice that you demanded when you forsook your covenants? That same agency can now be drawn upon to exert a great spiritual power of redemption.

The love we offer may be a tough love, but it is of the purest kind; and we have more to offer than our love.  We can teach you of the cleansing power of repentance. If covenants have been broken, however hard it may be, they may be reinstated, and you can be forgiven. Even for abortion? Yes, even that!